It's called a "flame thrower".

Chocolate Internet Goddess: why that's a mighty dirty trick. I sent you'll all to get the savage gnats and you come back with a lame rooster. Oh, lordy...i.....lordy...it's just one of those silly things. How will i ever save the capitol city.  Do you need more tarter sauce! you can get some down at the ddupe store near 51st streeter

Igor: Master! I, um, found one of those electric gnat swatters and rewired it for much higher voltage. It is currently connected to the arc welder. I hope this pleases. *chesher cat grin*

Master Arcturus: Good Igor! Now go eat some of those Gnats, in fact go eat all of those Gnats. Get Nasty to help you if you need help catching them. 

Igor: But they are gnasty gnats,  and do not even taste good with cat paste, Er ketsup. I would much prefer to set them on fire. Yes I like the fire much more master, may I please set them on fire?

Master Arcturus: as long we get them gone! we do not want the goddess angry at us.

Nastydramus: Come on, Igor. I have just the thing. The humans invented it. It's called a "flame thrower". One human said it was for when you have someone way over there you want to set on fire, but just aren't close enough to get the job done.

Savage Gnats

Chocolate Internet Goddess:  Yes, my  green with lemon tea is all the rage, it is more soothing than the trank…….why you ….. are you ….trying to tell me that you thought I had a vino?

Tis much too early in the day.

Really now, what has that to do with zee mission?

You have been advised to get out and get those Savage Gnats. They were last sighted in Austin, Tx near something called Congressional Ave. Big white building that had guard problems. Start there, fan out and get the job done.

It’s seems like such a silly thing, but “She Who Must Be Obeyed, has ordered it done.

No more back talk from you……get the Nasty and get ‘er done.

Ta

Nasty: Gnats? She wants gnats. Not just any gnats. *Savage* Gnats. *Fire Breathing* savage gnats.

Why does she hate you so much?

Master: I was specifically ordered to get Nasty and getter done.. I think you will like savage gnats, especially with tartar sauce..
I can see Igor now, swatter in one hand, tartar sauce in one hand and fork in one hand, swatting the Gnats down, holding them on the fork and saucing them and then stuffing them in his mouth. We need Nasty to spot those of the Gnats that go hyper so Igor can swat them.  

Goddess with short term memory problem

Chocolate Internet Goddess: I am warning you......my staple matic is not a toy. You vill not(the accent comes out when i get upset) it does not take much for me to....)

is that head music, is it a melody: aaaah from my squack box z reminder :breath in ...... and let it out, breath, breath...... what is the foul odor. ......oh, for the love of mikey...you didn't.
Trank....someone get me a trank.


Oh, which one of you is the one with the eye. I have a special assignment for you.
Speak up......do not tremble so, i am really gentle with.....
Hummmm what do i call you?

Master Arcturus: You call him Nasty..

Summoned!

Chocolate Internet Goddess: Attention........Hellooooooooo! (tremble ,,,tremble) it is so wonderful to have such power or these creatures. Wonder what She Who Must be Obeyed will say.




They are now at z attention. Good.



Would you fellows please report for duty. I have an emergency situation here.

No, you will not get to play or work with the oooy gooy. Yes if you are complete the job you will be rewarded in some fashion. And no my space crafter is not available to you.

(in an aside to the exalted one..... If either of them puts his grubby little hands on any thing in my office is is banishment).....



Ahem..... now creatures.....listen up.

Master Arcturus: Groveling in an appealing way, the Master approaches the Goddess with fear and terror. We are here Goddess.

Nobody: is that a staple matic 2000 thumb detacher i see on your desk? oooooo can i plaaaaaaaaayyyy with it? (Screamed while bouncing off the walls.)